On April 30, I celebrated ONE YEAR of celebrating Results & Goals Day. What began merely as a goal-setting activity really transformed my mindset towards the type of goals I set and helped me focus on the journey vs. the destination. It's helped me set a path towards accomplishing the unthinkable but mainly allowed me to recognize my true purpose and set me on the path to live a Wholehearted life.

Through this past year and a half, I’ve undergone transformation through a series of what I like to call change catalysts. These were things that changed my perspective on the way I was living my life. Similar to how The Science of Wellbeing course was a change catalyst in my learning journey and happiness driven success mindset, reaching my weight goal was my goal-setting change catalyst.

Doing more was always what I equated to being “better.” In fitness terms, this meant more workouts, more miles, and more races. It was what led me to sign up for 10 half marathons in 2019. While I was able to go the distance during those races, I was really putting my body in jeopardy of injury with little to no training before. The discipline that comes from the consistency of a training schedule really does establish the foundation to be able to reach new fitness heights. It made me realize that just because I could run 13 miles without training doesn’t mean that I should.

The first 3 months of quarantine, all I did was work and workout. I followed a beginner workout routine,ate super healthy, and minimized alcohol consumption. Before I knew it, I was following the intermediate schedule - integrating training plans for a fast half marathon (something I never did before), and lost thirty pounds. After seeing the results, I had achieved confidence to be able to try to achieve more. There it is again. But, as I continued to push myself mentally, physically, and intellectually I realized that my issues were still my issues when I checked off the goals. The true lessons came from being able to push through the journey and hard work that contributed to the accomplishments.

Here are three lessons I learned from goal-setting and achievement this past year:

1. Find beauty in the journey

   There is so much power in being able to maintain discipline that allows you to reach your goals. It takes 10, 000 hours to become an expert at something and this very notion is what allowed some of our greatest to become who they were (Outliers). If there isn’t any joy in the journey, then the external motivation will likely to be insufficient when aspiring towards something. It’s about showing up when it’s hard to put in the work. “Consistency is key in distance running. I’ve had more days when I don’t feel good than I feel good but I still show up and put in the work. Showing up when you don’t want to is half the battle (TRAINED).”

    One of my favorite moments where I truly experienced the beauty of the journey was during my Wholesome Folsom marathon. I decided to still run the distance despite CIM being cancelled. The first 13 miles were great, I was running at a steady pace feeling good. Then came the pain in my legs and mental blocks that represented my “wall.” Thoughts like “this sucks,” “why am I doing this,” “I can’t do it anymore” began circling my mind. The, after a few miles of just continuing to breathe and put one foot ahead of the other, I started to feel good again. It was incredible.

   My mind went from self-doubt to the zone, my absolute favorite feeling while running. When my head is clear and I feel energized through my entire body. Often the source of creativity and clarity from thoughts that usually occupy my mind. I had the idea of wanting to get married in an area so that all attendees could have a 360-degree view and my S.O. and I would walk into the arena (Daring Greatly) of our new life together. I also realized that if I was able to push through the physical and mental pain that came from running 26.2 miles, I could push through a few hours of daily studying for the GRE. To this day, I remember how I felt during this race more than any other. Maybe part of it is it not being a real race with distractions so it forced me to be with my thoughts. However, I think it’s because I’m able to see the journey of the distance giving me so much more value than crossing the ‘finish line’ and completing 26.2 miles.

2. Set values-based goals

   This year I recognized my desire to constantly do more and knew that in order to not choose goals that would compromise my wellbeing, I needed to choose goals based on my values. Setting and accomplishing goals is one of my favorite things - it leaves me feeling the dopamine and serotonin like no other. In reaching these values-based goals, I would be working towards or maintain a characteristic that I wanted to be part of my foundational identity. It’s helped me separate the idea that what I do doesn’t equal my worth. At the end of the day, my own perception of myself is what dictates the happiness i’m able to obtain from life.

3. Recognize the path isn’t linear

   One of my biggest takeaways in life so far is recognizing that life isn’t linear. We have been accustomed to follow paths and set forth towards what comes ‘next’ but life is so wavy. Opportunities and pitfalls take you in the left and right direction and sometimes these are the best lessons learned and greatest experiences. It’s so hard for someone like me with OCD/planner/control tendencies to just trust in what will happen, my brain is not wired for that lol.

   In listening to Brene Brown’s podcast episode with Angela Duckworth, they discussed how they wouldn’t have come across their current professional paths without a windy route that was unconventional to say the least (Dare to Lead). While I find comfort in knowing that I’m crafting my own path, it also used to cause anxiety not too long ago to be uncertain with my professional direction. My mind was filled with envy to those who were my age or younger who were on their paths for their future. It led me to think of myself as less. Yet, it was one of the biggest conversational topics of relatability that I had with peers. We’re all confused, uncertain, and in the quest of a path to follow. It’s so valuable to be reminded of the excitement that comes with the possibilities from uncertainty, it just has to be put at the forefront of my mind because naturally, I default to uncertainty = anxiety.

Sources:

Brown Brené. Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent and Lead. Avery, 2015.

Gladwell, Malcolm. Outliers. Penguin, 2009.

Nike. “Shalane Flanaga | The Power of Self-Talk and Community in Competition.” TRAINED. July 2018. https://open.spotify.com/episode/4VSXeQXitNxcwnUJjYdhiD?si=oVf1bG3ETU2Q4-PS8lf7zA&dl_branch=1.

Parcast Network. “Brené with Dr. Angela Duckworth on Grit and the Importance of Trying New Things.” Dare to Lead. 19 April 2021. https://open.spotify.com/episode/5zrRTA8BU4AUJm5qgW8Xwv?si=vjD-S5TISPa_6g1YdZ75Hw&dl_branch=1