One of the best things that came to me during the Pandemic has been this blog - having been inspired by creators taking leaps to forgo what people think, I decided to finally conquer creating a blog. It was something I had always aspired to do but was too fearful of the criticism of others. The fear still ensues with every new post but I try to remind myself that I’m not here to please anybody besides myself and the ultimate goal is to be authentic so that when I look back and read, I will be proud of the work I created. I can’t believe that it’s been one full year since AWA launched! This blog has been such a huge part of my life this year and after taking some time to really disconnect and think about what I wanted the future of AWA to look like - I’m so excited to announce that it’s only going to be leveling up from what was in store before. This past year, most of what’s on this website has been created by me and the help of recruited friends who kindly volunteered as editors. I couldn’t have done it without them but am in awe at how far it has come the past year. What’s to come will be even bigger and better because I have partnered with somebody who shares the vision of AWA to help me level up. I share this not only to build excitement for the next phase but share that I’m fully aware that I can’t take it to the next level alone. I invite others to think about how they can apply this notion to their own lives to seek help in leveling up in all of the life facets of their choosing.

This writing and emotional healing outlet have given me this beautiful landscape that I’m able to fill through words of my mind. In the first post, I shared my love language as words of affirmation. In some ways, this blog and its honest writing have been my own way of loving myself (or learning to). The creative flow I am put in stops time. This couldn’t have come into my life at a more opportune time. After my breakup, there was a desperate need for getting out of my head, finding ways to remind myself that I am worthy of love, and being able to rely only on myself to find that love and happiness. As much as I love journaling, it wasn’t cutting it. So when I started typing through all of the emotions I was experiencing, it was a roller coaster. But each time I put my hands on the keyboard and let myself go, it began the healing process. Studies have shown that “emotional writing” can improve people’s physical and emotional health (HBR). Affirmations gave me the emotional breakthrough of realizing that we are capable of changing the narratives of our lives. Recently, I had the realization of the notion that healing is not linear. The realization that life isn’t linear came to me a few months ago but I couldn’t help but still beat myself up as I experienced the waves that are bound to come when you grieve the loss of a long-term relationship. It would make me feel as though my progress was invalidated and that if “by now if I wasn’t feeling better, it would always be something I struggled with.” Chanel Miller’s gorgeous exhibit at the Asian Art Museum in San Francisco was what brought this realization to the forefront of my mind (I Was, I Am, I Will Be).

This blog has been an extension of my mind and I hope the message it conveys will demonstrate a true manifesto of my own values. As I continue to strive to bring a “real” representation of the life of an average girl, I can’t think of a better way to illustrate than my own journey through life through the pillars through which I express, move, learn, explore, and fight for justice. It won’t be easy but I hope to write about more vulnerable things that I’ve been working through as I reach my own internal peace with them. Taking the past few weeks to truly disconnect and delve into the roots of some of the issues that I’m grappling with have shown me the importance of shedding light on them since I really do believe that I’m not alone in the suffering. The Gifts of Imperfection summer series with Brene Brown and her sisters couldn’t have come at a better time as Mia & I make our way through the ten guideposts of Wholehearted living (Unlocking Us).

To everyone who has ventured to this blog and read one or more posts, thank you from the bottom of my heart. I wouldn’t be able to continue this without the support and love I have been shown. I will be in the process of a rebrand that I am coining ‘brand therapy’ and feedback about what you have found valuable, things that have room for improvement, or anything that you would like me to cover would be greatly appreciated.

Sources:

Chanel Miller: I was, I am, I will be. August 2020-February 2022. Asian Art Museum, San Francisco. https://exhibitions.asianart.org/exhibitions/chanel-miller-i-was-i-am-i-will-be/

Parcast Studios. “Part 6 of 6: Brené with Ashley and Barrett for the Summer Sister Series on The Gifts of Imperfection” Unlocking Us. 28 July 2021. https://brenebrown.com/podcast/part-6-of-6-brene-with-ashley-and-barrett-for-the-summer-sister-series-on-the-gifts-of-imperfection/

Siegel-Acevedo, Deborah. “Writing Can Help Us Heal from Trauma.” Harvard Business Review, 1 July 2021, hbr.org/2021/07/writing-can-help-us-heal-from-trauma.